Jokes
One liners, stories, groaners - we’ve got them all!
We all like a laugh, so here’s your chance to share those jokes with everyone. Rate the jokes we have here, or if you think yours is funnier why not submit your own?
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"Doctor, doctor! I need help with a problem! I keep forgetting everything I say!!"
Carl Elwell - Wednesbury
"When did this problem start?"
"What problem?" -
A panda walked into a bar. He went up to the bar and said "I'd like a steak and kidney pie and a Coke please" so the barman took his order and the panda went to sit down. Soon a waiter brought over his meal. The panda ate it up, thanked and tipped the waiter and paid the bill.
All this seemed pretty normal until the panda pulled out a gun from the depths of his fur, pulled the trigger and BANG! shot the waiter.
The barman came over and said "Wha.. wh.. You just shot my friend!!!" the panda calmly replied "Do you know what I am?" "Why yes," the barman answered. "Your a panda." "Good," the panda nodded "Now go home and look up 'panda' in the dictionary." And with that, the panda walked out of the bar.
The barman was a little unsure, however he was very eager to be enlighted on the subject of his friend's murder, so he went home to find his dictionary.
After a while, he found 'panda' and quickly read the definition:PANDA:
dave - walsall
1. A black and white bear native to China. Eats shoots and leaves. -
When they asked the two monocles why they never got together, they said they'd like to, but didn't want to make spectacles of themselves.
Wayne - Birmingham -
knock knock
who's there
Doctor
Doctor whoha ha, you said it already!!
Tom Bate - Dinglehampton
